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Eric Vance Walton
September 2009 
A Trip To The Farmer's Market
Posted on May 25th, 2009
by 
Eric
Eric
Do you ever have one of those days where you feel as if the world around you is slightly eschewed and people are just a tad bit ornerier and distracted? Well, yesterday was such a day. We decided make a trip to the St. Paul Farmer's Market to buy the plants we need to finish our garden. Keep in mind the trip is a short one, only six miles, but honestly it felt as though we were immersed the Matrix playing Grand Theft Auto.
On the way there we were nearly side-swiped twice. In both instances the drivers of the vehicles were oblivious to what was going on around them as they were talking on cell phones. On the way back someone made a left turn in front of us at a light that had clearly been red for over 30 seconds. If I had to venture a guess, this particular individual was probably in his eighties with the Orville Reddenbacher style white hair, so I can cut him some slack.
As a result of this experience we decided that part of the driver's test should be a virtual reality exercise to evaluate a person's ability to multi-task while driving. The first level would be to see if they can chew gum while operating a vehicle. Somewhere around five levels above the chewing gum test would involve a live cell phone call while driving through a congested urban area. If unable to pass level five there would be a graphic of a cell phone with a large red, "no symbol" imprinted above it on their license plate.
This would, at the very least, give all others fair warning to give them the right away. Until then my eyes will be peeled for people using cell phones and Orville Reddenbacher look-a-likes.
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